Today marks a very special place in my heart. Today, six years ago Grimace and I welcomed our first-born, Giggles Magoo into the world. It’s hard to identify why the sixth birthday is significant, but after some contemplation, I think I’ve recognised that turning six well and truly means my Little Love is no longer as young as he was.

Well, duh. They get older. That’s obvious. But, there is a boundary that changes when they are six, or rather, I’ve perceived there will be a widening of the boundaries when the age of six happens and a lessening of my sphere of influence. It’s all well and good to have thoughts on these things, but when it’s playing out, it’s pretty mind-blowing to actually be celebrating a sixth birthday!

Sure, the parenting days are very different to what they were 6 years ago: toileting habits are much more independent, feeding is no longer an emotional and physical rollercoaster that drags out for hours and sleeping arrangements are FAR easier etc etc. But, each age challenges you as a person, as a parent, just that little but more. Oh what I wouldn’t do for that connection with newborn Giggles Magoo, where I was his only world – the smiles, the gurgles and the cuddles. Don’t get me wrong – It is very lovely to see my boy connect with the world around him as a child: making friends, listening intently to other adults, absorbing the every day like a sponge – I am darn proud of him. But, I realise I haven’t processed the emotional side of him leaving newborn/toddler/pre-schooler age. I suppose while all that was happening, I was busy with the other Little Love that came into our family – Little Mate, and I probably wasn’t able to give it much thought.

If you’ve not met him yet, Giggles Magoo is a force to be reckoned with – lovely and sweet, but I defy anyone that comes across his path to change his mind when he has it made up. He knows exactly what he wants (mostly…in a six-year-old context anyway) and perhaps the bigger picture isn’t his focus yet, you have your work cut out if you try to convince him any other way. He is fiercely competitive and always quick to know what is right. He is patient and gentle as well as impatient and like a whirlwind, all at the same time. He loves his little brother dearly, if not fiercely. I hope he maintains all of these traits, along with his ability to bring a lighthearted angle to any situation. Oh my, his laugh is completely infectious – when you hear it, you can’t help but laugh along with him. Giggles Magoo, what a leader you will make.

Anyway, I hope you’ll join me in celebrating my first Littlest Love – HAPPY BIRTHDAY GIGGLES MAGOO!

Dear Grimace, my biggest love.

We’ve made it to ten years. Ten years ago today, we ‘tied the knot’. That goddamn priest must have been a previous boy scout or naval sailor or something, as the knot was tied good and proper and we’ve prospered together. I still remember that night, in fact the entire weekend with so much joy. I felt loved by you, by your family, my family and our wider community. I also remember feeling pride: pride for the wonderful celebration we organised; pride for knowing I was going to have you with me for the rest of forever.

We’ve achieved so much together and on our own as individuals knowing we’re fully supported by the other (better) half. We’ve made sure we acknowledged and celebrated it all. Upon reflection, I’ve decided another of our strengths has been to learn how to celebrate the things that didn’t work out, the things that weren’t quite a failure. You make me laugh, make me scream with frustration, but mostly you just make me feel complete and way less vulnerable. With you by my side I know I just need to give something a go and your support will aid my determination.

You have always encouraged me – encouraged me to be the happy and driven person. You’ve set me up with a mountain bike, a motorbike, a passion for running and walking, a passion for live music (it was you who made me listen to Camp Cope…I still remember you saying “Babe, I’ve come across this band that I think you’ll really like”. It was you who introduced me to The Bronx, to Against Me! and to a multitude of other bands that have become a big part of my music love). I always feel inspired to encourage you and I hope that you see my harassing of you as the same encouragement that you offer me. Perhaps I need to fine tune the delivery of my encouragement 🙂

Your kind, caring and gentle soul always seems to get a smile and a story out of everyone you come across. While you are a self-confessed introvert, I see the joy you get out of hearing everybody else’s story – you are fascinated by the  unique way each person will walk this world. I’m learning that your gentle soul can also be awash with ferocity when there is something that you want, or believe should be. Not ferocious in a violent way, rather a focused and resilient way and you will work hard to make it work. You are incredibly loyal and I have benefited in so many ways from you and all these wonderful traits. I’m learning that you are a direct replica of both your mother and father by emulating their approach.

Grimace, here’s to the 10 years past, and the rest we have ahead. We are reaching for the stars together with love, companionship and laughs. The tougher times seem to blur into the shinier times. Maybe it’s my predisposition to see the happier things in life, but I genuinely feel that most of our time is happiness and that is joy. I love everything about you babe xx

The autumn months have hit our calendar, but the weather isn’t really playing along… it’s not the conventional autumn we’re used to (it’s going to be a top of 33 degrees today) and so we are full of anticipation; restless in our anticipation for when it is going to get cold, impatiently anticipating all those things that a change of season brings.

A few things have been ruffling the impatience and restlessness…When daylight savings was stopped for the season all those weeks ago, I felt a sense of relief that I must admit I’ve never felt before.  I was relieved that the season would be changing, the days shorter and the weather cooler. Yet, here we are still feeling the lack of energy only a hot day can impart.

I’m off work today with Little Mate who has unfortunately fallen foul of the flu – those with young ‘uns will know very well that sickness is the first sign of change of season. Doc confirmed an ear infection is really the cause of the miserable behaviour, and while easily treatable, I can’t help begrudge the unnecessary heat at this time of year as being the cause.

Giggles Magoo has just about finished his first full term of school (4 days to go), and quite remarkably is not ready for holidays. He has fallen into the throes of school with ease and is enjoying the ‘everyday’ of his teacher and peers. But, I do think the holidays will come and the right time to keep him feeling engaged. And us too. Grimace and I have survived the school induction and are awaiting the school holiday craziness.

So, my general theme at the moment is waiting: waiting for autumn to really appear (and for the heat to kick it down a notch), waiting for the complete change in pace that winter offers. Waiting for life to find it’s groove again.