The rhythm of life took a sort ‘2 steps forward/1 step back’ kind of path. No wait, it’s been a couple of years of stop, slowly start, stop again, longer bigger stop, soft go, stop, go, stop, go… Well, you get the picture. Between family chaos, family changes, health matters and just other stuff that pops up, I was forced to abandon any discipline or regularity in being physically active. By now, you’ll all roll your eyes when I espouse the love I have for being outside, and more particularly the love I have for adventure and running. And with that eye roll and slight irritation, you’ll start to have an insight into my feelings of loss and grief when talking about removing one part of my identity that brought me such joy (the last 2 years has definitely seen many parts of my identity change, but then that happens as the years pass, right?!).

Anyway, fast forward 2 years, add in a few recent pieces of good news and time passing, you’ll imagine my joyous smile at reporting I’ve slowly been working away to rebuilding my capacity, bringing those dreams of regularly running away (well, briefly anyway) to the wilderness just that little bit closer.

In fact, on the weekend just passed, I was lucky enough to hit some trails with a long term running buddy, and it felt just like old times. I’m quick to remind myself that it is pointless longing for days gone by – they are lovely memories, but wishing I could easily live out those memories is almost a waste of my last 2 years.

Over the last 2 years, I’ve learnt so much about my capacity for resilience, for patience, for quieting the anxious thought process that I’ll be stuck in the “rest” bubble forever. I would do better to remind myself that in fact, it is an immense privilege I have to even be able to experience the wilderness, let alone adventure in it. An adventure ready/able-body is not something that is so simply accessed. On top of that, nor does everyone have readily accessed trails as I do, and so that equally reminds me to appreciate all my adventures; the last 2 years have only served to fuel my gratitude.

So, on Sunday when I joyfully met at sunrise to traipse across many a gushing creek crossing, to find myself skirting around many muddy puddles (not the new shoes!), well you can imagine the joy and gratitude I had flowing. I had not felt as free and connected as I did in that moment for the longest time. It was the best 10km of fun I’d had in such a long time. Well, actually, since the day before where I did some indoor rock climbing.

Both days of putting my arms, legs, lungs and heart to heavy work served to remind me that my mind and body are strong, as is the honour and privilege I have to be out adventuring.

Maybe I’ll get another adventure soon, maybe it’ll take some time until the stars align. And that’s cool, I’ll just (im)patiently know the next adventure will come. They always do. For now, I’m here working through all the “NO, I’M NOT HAVING A SHOWER”‘s, or the “WHY DON’T YOU EVER BELIEVE ME, YOU LOVE X MORE THAN ME”s (spoken like a true middle child) and “I’m not doing that if I don’t want to”s, dreaming.

Travel with kids can be so beautiful, but these treasured memories are usually at the destination. The transit is usually, actually all of the time just a red hot mess.

To all those that contended with the screams of an overtired and cantankerous 3 year old flying Cairns to Osaka because the inflight entertainment system sporadically worked, thanks for keeping any bad vibes to yourself.

To those that witnessed a neurodivergent kid absolutely lose it at Cairns airport check in queue after 95mins of waiting and still being very far from the counter, thank you for not offering to intervene or expecting they “just get over it”.

To those that saw an older brother niggle his siblings until snapping point, thank you for not voicing your judgement and having silent recognition for his struggles.

And to all those that witnessed the beauty in the smaller, happier moments in our transit, well, thank you for celebrating them with us. Your smiles, little nods of delight or high-5’s left us all feeling like we’d managed ok.

I always seem to forget the depths of those harder or challenging times when it comes to the kids. I know it’s my resilience in action, coupled with the trap of wanting a harder moment to pass (and quickly at that). I’ve had a few moments during the transit to our overseas holiday where I’ve contemplated walking away, however each time I’ve found my courage to make it through, and each time I’ve reminded myself: She who is courageous will always be rewarded.

After a 3am wake-up to make our 6am flight, this trip was never going to be easy. But when we get off the plane (and through immigration and then customs), we’re going to be in Japan. And any good adventurer knows, the best adventures are the ones with the biggest challenge.

I’m off for adventure x

What’s that you hear? Rebecca Black’s obviously auto-tuned voice welcome you to Friday? Well, apologies for that, it is just in fact how I start most of my Fridays. You see, the children have cottoned onto the amazing world of music streaming, which now means that most days we have music playing at home to help us get out the door. Usually, the vibes are any version of The Wiggles or minecraft / roblox / fortnite inspired tunes (yuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck) that have corrupted my streaming-service, but Fridays are reserved for, well you’ve probably guessed it…songs all about Fridays. It’s gimmicky and fun.

Over the last few months, we’ve cobbled together a play list that contains tunes which directly reference Friday. Obviously, there’s Rebecca Black’s little diddy about Friday, and then the annoying Annoying Orange rip-off aptly named Fry-Day (easily my least favourite, which is surprising considering the annoyance level of my first referenced song, but there you go). Some of the others give us a bit more street cred (e.g. The Cure’s Friday I’m in Love, or David Bowie’s cover of Friday on my Mind or even the Easybeat’s original) – but I think my favourite Friday Tune is by little-known Western Sydney band*, Amends: Walking Backwards.

What I love about this song is not only the sentiment (it’s Friday night, so let’s raise hell and we can get saved on Sunday morning) – sort of like that ‘live in the moment’ sentiment, but I love the harmonica-laden intro and the way Laura Jane Grace joins in on vocals. Each time I hear this song, I am reminded at how powerful I find music. It shifts my mood, almost every single time – and quite often leaves me thinking deeply about the possible meaning or story behind the words.

Anyway, after recently having the hilarity that is The Shovel land in my inbox, I am indeed reclaiming my Spotify algorithm. Alas, with the Unwrapped thing released, I am just as horrified – it is my worst one to date.

Happy Friday to those that celebrate

*Only evidence I actually have of them being little-known is the live show I recently saw them at…there were not many peeps there. I will happily be corrected if you do infact, know this band. I really like them, so maybe you will too!

Oh hi there! Today is a day I’ve been waiting for, for a long time… are you ready for the explanatory note on why? Make sure you’re ready, make sure you’re ready… it is terribly exciting. Are you ready? Well, here we go: so, today, I caught the train to work! I’m back on the commute! Well, sort of. Sometimes. Ahemmmmm, well, today only actually. Queue the cough*cough.

And, “why is this interesting?” I hear you ask. Well, friend, allow me to divulge… this news means I have some commuting time – I can sit still (yes! I got a seat), trying not to touch or make eye contact with anyone, and in complete anonymity. These sometimes beautiful things mean I can take the opportunity and write a little! Better yet, there is some sort of delay! Joy! More writing time! Life’s myriad of competing demands means that I rarely find this time. So today, I am celebrating the commute, even the annoyance of a slight, unexplained delay cannot dull my shine.

Aside from the joy I derive from writing about nothing, I also find some kind of joy in being a faceless member of the public transport commuting crowd. There is a lot of adult responsibility I find myself bouncing to and fro, attempting to always do the right thing/be the right person. And don’t get me wrong, I love it most days – and yet, to find these precious moments where I am un-needed by anyone feel like the biggest gift.

So maybe the shine has worn off slightly, with a train announcement just signalling I am going to be here a while due to a “technical issues”. Those my friends, are two words no one ever wants to hear about the mode of transport that is hurtling them at speed.

Anyway, whatever your redeeming and inane joyous moment is, I hope you are able to indulge and really lean in. Enjoy your Thursday x

PS. There are some truly horrific events happening around the world this week, and some very big questions to be answered here in Australia that have many people with broken hearts. I see you. I want to hug you. and Yes, I want you to be supported so you too can find a moment.

PPS. Update to my train situ: the train has been terminated mid-tracks. Here is me a few weeks ago, at a much more peaceful adventure (that did not involve alighting a train onto the tracks!)

In a recent effort to contain the chaos, I briefly considered spending dollarbucks on a swanky space, close to the family engineroom (A.K.A The Kitchen) to help the five of us prepare for the week ahead. Who am I kidding really….the space was to help ME be a little more organised for the week (plus working to find an easier way to share the work of running a family). I’d seen a few organising hubs on the socials, and thought “yeah, I can do that”. Ha. yeah, I “could” do that, but during one of the toddler’s daysleeps, I got started using resources we’ve already got at home, saving those dollarbucks for another time. It turned out to be quite a nice little space!

I gathered my favourite/well used cookbooks, found a picture frame not being used, added the daily “to do” thingy for the kids, along with the wooden calendar/time/season toy thingy one of the kids had buried in their room (clearly not being used in any effective manner) and placed these all on the side table, underneath the clock (which just so happens to be close to the kitchen). It was supposed to be a bit of a trial and I’d add to it as needed, but my loose approach has turned out to be the perfect approach. The cookbooks inform the mealplan (that’s written on the picture frame), the clock continues to pass time and the organising things help the kids know what day of the week it is, what the days weather will be and what task they need to be doing to keep us all moving in the right direction. I must admit, I have found it quite remarkable at the number of times each family member has used the space…how had I not thought of implementing a space like this this before?

I’ve found that with the meal plan being so publicly available, the burden of picking a meal for the family and then actually cooking it is much less, both adults are aware what the meal options are making an a-grade kitchen partnership and even the most vocal offspring-critic has been silenced. I’m not sure if the kiddies like being included in picking a meal for the week, or the fact that they can read “what’s for dinner” – essentially they’ve had to find other questions to whinge at me, because that one is already answered. In any case, I now have much less resistance to dinner options simply by having the menu on display. I even had an inspired 7 year old, who started this week’s meal plan – turns out he loves chicken, however even if we’re eating chicken each meal, it is very nice to share the burden of picking the family meals!

I got the space set up a few weeks back and have been using it very consistently, yet I haven’t really hit a rhythm with the day of the week I plan ahead or do the shopping. I have found I quite like a flexible approach and I don’t need to consistently plan the weekly meals on the same day – I can haphazardly do the meal planning as I remember or have space to do so (or can use the meal picking as a way of separating some of the bickering kids), and with everything in the one place, it’s pretty quick to get through.

I really didn’t think I was the “Organising Station” type, but here I am and loving it. What do you do that really helps keep your chaos a bit calmer?

Hey Tuesday, nice of you to roll around again. Thanks for stopping by.

Tuesday has previously been my least favourite day of the week. Maybe I’ve written about this before? Oops, my bad if I’m recycling content, but I guess there is only so much original content I can expect to create in my current season of life. Oops, and there I go again, distracting myself from my point. What was I typing about? Ahh yes, my previous deep resentment toward a Tuesday. No doubt this deep resentment stems from my previous life as a teenager, forced to attend long Tuesdays at School, sometimes with double maths, or double history or double science, or double whatever subject I found hard to concentrate on (HINT: there was a lot of them). eeeeek. Tuesday boringly became the bleak day that signified moving on from the glorious weekend days just passed, but did not yet allow the excited thoughts for the weekend that lay ahead – it was still too far away, too many days to get through. What developed in my mind at the thought of Tuesday, was a dreary feeling, always containing a sense of ‘hard’ (and cold). I really resented Tuesdays for existing.

Fast forward a bit, to 2022 where I’m 21 years post-high school (don’t do that maths), have 10-years experience being a part-time working parent and add in my recent forced understanding that life doesn’t always need to move in the fast lane; combine all this and I’ve moved my deep resentment to a tolerable state.

Hear that Tuesday, I now T O L E R A T E you. You’ve still got some work to do too – like, maybe some golden sunshine every now and then (today’s effort was better than the last one) or maybe a sparkling rainbow to show that you’re really trying. I promise I’d see it and feel more aligned with your vibe.

In this season of my life, Tuesdays have begun to afford me time with Little Miss at her gymnastics class (watching a group of toddlers navigate a class is pretty fun, in the same way that herding cats could be fun), followed by coffee in town and sometimes the leisurely pace a toddler allows (I say leisurely, but that may need to be read as frenetic). There is also the fact that every other Tuesday I enjoy the bonus time with the boys during school hours (we have an existing fortnightly appointment with a clinician that is immensely helpful to both boys’ education and as such, I’m the lucky parent that gets to ferry them there and back to school).

Tuesdays also feature an extracurricular activity for both boys and in normal function, myself as well. It’s the time the three of us explore a fitness pursuit away from the home and we each love our chosen activity. Mine is usually a coached running session, and the boys a Taekwondo session. So by the time we’ve gotten to the end of Tuesday, a sense of rejuvenation has occurred across the family unit – we’ve all enjoyed some time away, some fun, some focus and a release.

You’re probably tired reading about just how much our regular Tuesday entails (and I haven’t even touched on the usual daily things that have to happen – getting everyone out the door with clothes on and a packed bag, meal prep for the working days ahead, clothes washing, house tidy, grocery collection etc etc.), I used to wear this busyness as a badge of honour – but these days, I am choosing to see Tuesdays in a better light. In a way that I feel connected to the family and even myself.

A lot of Tuesday is about moving from here and there to everywhere, and yet I have found practicing a little mindfulness means my commitment to stay at peace while the rushing around occurs, works. I am refusing to give rise to the urgency that could be there, that pressure to be at the next time commitment before that time rolls around. What is surprising is the honour I give that commitment…until Wednesday morning (when hump day rolls around and it is crazy stations to get everyone out the door to where they need to be).

The universe seems to have reminded me that I always have a story to share. Not in the “make up” or fictional story sense, rather just the sharing of some of what transpires in my world. You see, I always seem to have the slightly absurd or the completely inane life moment where I then find myself sharing with anyone that will listen (and as I live in a community where I pretty much know everybody, it’s a lot of people I share the narrative with). And as it turns out, I quite enjoyed broadcasting this narrative to you over the years (which is how this little slice of interwebs came about), I really found my creative outlet. But as time went by, I lost my way sharing these stories.

I somehow lost my confidence in what anyone else would find interesting and I started to do what high school English did to me… The negative framing I gave myself ended up inferring I wasn’t really good enough. Hello, blog imposter. That approach robbed me of my permission to write (then and now) and actually for a time I lost that creative output. Anyway, let’s just say I love to share my story and I think those that are subject to my verbal stories need a break, so I’m here, sharing with you (again, again).

Right now, I’m going to share one of the more lighter stories in my current world, perhaps you’ll possibly lean toward it not even being a story. I don’t really mind. I’m not going to yet regale you with the tale of my rescue by helicopter from a semi-remote location (which made made the nightly news) or the time I got a horrible post-viral rash literally all over my body (in the summertime heat). Nope, actually, I don’t think I’ll ever write about a rash. That just doesn’t seem right!

This time, I’m going to share with you the time I was reflecting to my colleague, Kiralee that I’m a storyteller and really love having an outlet for that kind of creativity. And she simply said to me, “YOU HAVE A BLOG?? Have you written one about me? Why don’t you write one with my name in it? Just do the writing”. So this little piece is dedicated to you Kiralee, for being the person who reminded me to value my own creativity (and yes, who really does deserve more than one lame blog with her name in it!)

If you were to ask me what my favourite day of the week is, I’d simply look at you, smile a big smile and inform you: “Friday is my favourite day, ever”. I think it started when I was a baby, probably on the day I was born…a Friday. My love of Friday continued throughout school (I always seemed to have sport on a Friday) and then into my working life. Particularly now, as I work part-time, I don’t ever work Fridays. I just love Fridays. I can’t exactly put my finger on why I love it so; perhaps the thrill of the weekend ahead, the promise of new memories, adventures. Or perhaps at this stage of my life, it just means two lunchbox-free days 🤔. Anyway, Friday is always on my mind – I love them!

Well, make sure you don’t ask my other half if his favourite day is also a Friday. He will stare at you with ice in his heart, and say he hates Fridays. He’ll tell you that Fridays are the day where everything goes wrong, a reminder that he has to work Saturdays, and that we’re all doomed to a hell-hole of despair. He will tell you that Fridays always remind him of the hopelessness of human nature. Brace yourself for the positivity that isn’t, when you talk with Grimace about Fridays.

It’s really only one of a few topics that we’re not on the same page.

Anyway, moving right along from the hell-hole of despair, last Friday was the last* of our summertime Friday afternoons (until next summer, anyway). And I wanted to mark it with the kids by doing something outdoorsy, something filled with adventure. Something that included splashing in water. We’re in the Blue Mountains, on the East-coast of Australia, and this summer has been impacted significantly by the 2020–21 La Niña event. This has meant lots of rain and we’ve not had the opportunity to explore our local swimming holes as much as we’d like (and please, don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining about the rainfall. It’s been a heaven in comparison to the the hell that was 2019/2020 summer).

So, with adventure in mind, I packed an afternoon tea picnic, everyone’s swimming and reef shoes, and collected the kids from school. We headed to Blue Mountains National Park in Glenbrook, where we walked down into Glenbrook Gorge. The afternoon was beautifully warm and featured bright blue skies; the creek running at a good speed from the recent rain. Once we’d made our way to bottom of the gorge, the kids and I rock hopped until we found a nice little spot on the creek to swim.

I had a moment of parent pride and joy, as I watched all three kids splashing in the water, laughing together. The Friday afternoon adventure was so worth the extra effort to get us there, particularly as I was able to watch them enjoy the outdoors.

The Glenbrook Gorge walk starts from the National Park car park, just behind the NPWS Office building. It’s a beautiful and fairly easy walk, being well-marked and easy to navigate. There are a number of stairs, so the walk out is less than lovely, but it’s very achievable – I managed it fairly well whilst carrying a 7.5kg baby on my front and a fully-packed day pack on my back. The kids even managed it with very little complaint.

Anyways, it’s good that today is Friday, as I’ve got Friday on my mind. Just don’t ask Grimace.

The dawn of 2021 has seen me don my best notebook and crayon (let’s be honest, as a family with young children, pens and pencils are never ever where they are supposed to be…or anything, actually) and take to journalling. If you’ve read any of my previous posts, it’s no secret that I enjoy writing. When we became a family of five, I unsurprisingly haven’t had the chance to write anything for my blog, and so journalling seemed like the next best thing to fill the void. That, and I realised I could hold a sacred space with my tween, by sharing a journal. And me being me (it’s rare I do new things unenthusiastically), I nabbed not one, but FOUR journals. Yep, 4. Because, well, I’m not really sure … But, there’s one for me to me, one for Grimace and I, one for Little Mate and I, and of course the tween, Giggles Magoo and I.

Needless to say, I’ve been writing more often, which feels great. They are never long entries or too reflective, but I’m wearing my best patient pants, and am waiting to grow into dedicating that amount of time to writing. For the time being, I’m happy sharing my random thoughts with the boys (if I’m honest, the journal I have for Grimace and I is still unwrapped, unwritten in… Soon, soon I tell myself).

Today’s Journal entry is something I feel I want to share on here, with you. With my writing continuing to develop, I felt inspired to catch one of those moments in time that as a parent, I wish to never forget. So here goes…

“Happy Friday. It feels good to be at the end of the week. The boys are no doubt hanging out for the weekend, where screens, screams, snacks and sleeps are their favourite things. I wonder what movie it will be tonight.

Today I had a few errandy-type things to do with Little Miss Moody. Firstly, an osteo appt for me. Unfortunately Little Miss Moody was not keen on said appointment, and spent a high percentage of it screaming at the beautiful secretary who was volunteered to hold her. She was giving her best rendition of an unsettled/screaming baby (imagine a type of muderous scream, that is really tiresome for everyone involved). The rushed appointment gave me some sweet relief, but unfortunately, my littlest love was super unsettled and essentially screamed this poor woman’s ears off. But, after a long cuddle and promises of being together for the rest of the day, it was onto the grocery shopping for us.

I’d opted to use the baby carrier whilst shopping for Little Miss Moody, just to try and undo the traumatic screams just moments ago, as well as giving her some security – she was snuggled in nice and close to me and was giggling away as I chatted to her as we went along collecting the never-ending shopping supplies. I leaned in and started playfully kissing her on the nose. With each kiss, she would giggle and giggle. I noticed that gradually those giggles got quieter and quieter. I realised that with each kiss, her eyelids were staying shut for longer and longer, eyelids heavier and heavier.

I stopped being busy shopping and really noticed my love, really noticed me enjoying the moment. Could this really be happening? My baby is going to sleep whilst being kissed and giggling?

It was true! She was indeed starting to doze off. As I stood in the quiet corner of our local shop, I shared a genuine drunk-with-love moment with my baby girl, as she lulled herself off to sleep with giggles and smooches. I felt so full within, so emotionally satisfied and connected as I carried her along to complete the shop.

Time, would you mind standing still, please. Can I hold this little love, in this very moment, for as long as possible?”

I feel really very happy that today’s Journal entry is capturing that precious moment in time 🥰

Do you have a simple, yet precious moment you’d just love to preserve? I’d love to hear from you.

Happy Friday x